I Only Asked For Bread

...and somehow ended up with a bakery.

In my last post I mentioned that one of my weaknesses is trusting that I am worthy of all of God's goodness through answered prayer. To re-cap, it says in Matthew 5:9-11, "You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him."

My lack of trust has nothing to do with God answering my prayers or not, cause the more I look at my history of relationship with Him, it's clear to see that I am insane for believing this lie. One thing that is for sure though is that my previous lack of vulnerability in bringing things to Him limited my ability to see clearly all the answers to the prayers that I dared not utter. It's a little sad to think of all the time that I wasted, never realizing that I was compartmentalizing my relationship with God when all He wants is to spend time with us; for us to know Him.

So I've been praying about everything.

For three months I prayed about moving. The only answer that I got from God was, "Wait."

50 Feet In The Air

Everyone struggles with something in their faith right?
Or, I'm the only one...?

Lately I've really been trying to correct some unbelief I have in the area of prayer.
In short, I'm the kind of person that totally believes in prayer, that God blesses and heals and listens to the hearts of his children. I believe prayer works... for other people.
I've always struggled a bit with the truth that God cares about me and actually wants bless my life in huge ways. Not because I don't believe He is able, but because maybe, there's a reason He would not want to be willing.

It sounds kind of ridiculous to struggle with that, especially knowing that if it were not for God and his plans for my life, I would not be in this place right now, this place in which I am absolutely, undeniably content and even thrilled.

But it's true, I have weaknesses, lots of them, just like you.
*gasp* Yeah, I just called you out.

He is Real, Just Ask Ann

The first of a (hopefully) long series of people sharing their stories of how God has changed them.

But first, here's a short behind the scenes video.

He will NOT let me go!

His grip on me is so strong I can't do anything to shake it.

Today was a day that took me by surprise.

For anyone who works for, or is involved in ministry, in a Sunday morning church service, you know what I'm talking about when I say, sometimes, you have to make an effort to remember why and who you are serving.

It's easy to get lost in the 'work' aspect of your day and miss out on the worship, the message and ultimately miss out on what the Holy Spirit is doing in that room.

I'm guilty of that sometimes, especially when directing the video feed. As a director, your job is to talk constantly to camera operators, computer operators, sound people and anyone else you need to talk to in order to make everything run smoothly.

But today, I found myself in a place that took every ounce of responsibility in me not to drop my walkie-talkies, abandon my video mixer and just worship! And from 11am this morning even until this very minute, 9:30pm, Jesus has not left my side.

It's an encounter in which He sought me out. And it is so true of His character.

I've just gone through a difficult week emotionally... and spiritually. 

I failed this week. 

I ultimately needed forgiveness in a big way this week. 

And just as I weakly try to crawl from my hole and face my God, He acts as if I did nothing wrong.

"How God? How can you just love me like this after what I've done?"

"You brought your failures to me and admitted that you needed my help right?"

"Yeah."

"You asked for my forgiveness didn't you?"

"Yeah, I did."

"Then it's gone. Let's move on."