Or, I'm the only one...?
Lately I've really been trying to correct some unbelief I have in the area of prayer.
In short, I'm the kind of person that totally believes in prayer, that God blesses and heals and listens to the hearts of his children. I believe prayer works... for other people.
I've always struggled a bit with the truth that God cares about me and actually wants bless my life in huge ways. Not because I don't believe He is able, but because maybe, there's a reason He would not want to be willing.
It sounds kind of ridiculous to struggle with that, especially knowing that if it were not for God and his plans for my life, I would not be in this place right now, this place in which I am absolutely, undeniably content and even thrilled.
But it's true, I have weaknesses, lots of them, just like you.
*gasp* Yeah, I just called you out.
But I've been trying to abandon the lies that I've ingrained in myself over the years that I, me, Connie, am undeserving of God's grace... which, ironically enough, He gives to me every morning. So I've been praying more. Specific prayers, un-eloquent prayers, real prayers, small prayers and big prayers. Ultimately forcing myself to be completely vulnerable in my conversations with God.
This month, a big prayer for me was money. Despite what a lot of Africans may think, not ALL missionaries are rich. And because of moving costs, I recently found myself over my head in the accounts department.
But I know someone who has access to LOADS of money. And that someone is more than willing to help me with it. Because scripture tells us that,
You parents—if your children ask for a loaf of bread, do you give them a stone instead? Or if they ask for a fish, do you give them a snake? Of course not! So if you sinful people know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your heavenly Father give good gifts to those who ask him. -Matthew 7:9-11So, I prayed for finances and his response was quick!
A few days before any bills needed to be paid I got a text from a friend of mine in my neighborhood. She wanted me to free up my Saturday morning to help her with a project. If I could do that, she would make a donation to my ministry. This donation was pretty much what I needed in order to get my rent and bills paid without going under for another month. This was my answer to prayer. And to top things off, just to prove to little ol' me that He DOES love me and want to give me good gifts, my God, this incredibly surprising Father abounding in only good things, gave me the opportunity of a life time!
And I decided to share it with you... well, you know, as best I could...